Time to read: 5 minutes
What we are unpacking today:
Hi {{first_name | default: 'there'}}!
I don't know about you, but for me mid-October always brings the same thing: the race to year-end. More work piles up, and with it, more questions trying to figure out how to get everything done.
Beyond the Coaching Session
Have you thought what happens after AI helps you craft the perfect response to a difficult email? After it helps you prepare for that tough conversation?
This question keeps coming up in my coaching practice. And it's more nuanced than a recent Swiss newspaper headline suggested.
Excerpt from the Sonntagszeitung 5th October, 2025
The Swiss article that caught my attention wasn't wrong to be concerned. People are turning to AI for relationship advice, emotional support, and guidance. The therapist they interviewed saw clients using ChatGPT as a buffer against uncomfortable conversations. Some were crafting messages but never sending them. Others were replacing real dialogue with digital processing.
But here's what the article missed: the real issue isn't whether people use AI for personal challenges. It's what happens in the gap between the AI conversation and the human one.
I've watched this with my clients using our AI coaching tool. The technology offers something valuable: a judgment-free space to work through messy thoughts before you're ready to share them. It can help you move from "I'm so angry I could scream" to "Here's what I actually need to communicate."
That part is powerful. AI doesn't get defensive. It won't interrupt with its own agenda. It can reflect back what you're saying in ways that help you see your patterns more clearly.
In my view, the sweet spot is using AI as preparation, not replacement. Think of it like rehearsing a presentation. You practice to build confidence and clarity. But you don't skip the presentation just because you practiced.
I believe the question isn't whether to use AI for difficult conversations. It's whether we use it as a bridge to better human connection or a wall against it.
The Success Trap
As much as I love a good conversation with an AI coach, nothing replaces the magic of meeting up in person. Like we did at the beginning of October, with our group of corporate innovators at our #OpenDoorInnovation community.
We'd asked everyone to bring a book that shaped their thinking. I brought Marshall Goldsmith's "What Got You Here Won't Get You There."
I like this book, because it isn’t telling me what to learn, to add up on my pile of to-learn list. It tells me what to unlearn.
This is exactly what Goldsmith writes about. The behaviors that made you successful can become the obstacles that hold you back. And the more successful you've been, the harder it is to let go of what worked.
One of these behaviours that I can relate to very much: adding too much value.
You've been rewarded your entire career for jumping in with ideas, improving other people's suggestions, and showing your expertise. Now you need to hold back and let others develop their thinking. But holding back feels like you're not contributing.
There are 20 such behaviours listed in Marshall’s book. I work through them with some of my coaching clients - any I work through them myself as well.
Check them out and see what you may unlearn.
Maybe the next level of leadership isn't about getting better at what we already do well. It's about recognizing when our strengths have become limitations.
The Power of Not Knowing
I have learnt that asking better questions is the key to growth. Even more so in these times, where AI gives us the answer to anything. When answers get cheap, it's the questions that make a difference.
My session during the Iventiv Learning Futures Basel even was just on this. With global corporate learning & development leaders in the room, we discussed what will set us apart, when AI can give any answers.
My session on coaching mindset in the age of AI
I am convinced that the coaching mindset is our answer. Not coaching as in "hire a coach," but coaching as in how you show up in everyday conversations. It's about being curious rather than jumping to solutions. Listening more than talking. Creating trust so people feel safe to explore and grow.
A coaching mindset means you see your role differently. You're not there to have all the answers. You're there to help others find their own. You ask "What do you think?" instead of "Here's what to do." You create space instead of filling it.
And it’s contagious. Teams take more ownership. They solve problems you didn't even know existed. The questions you ask as a leader become the questions your whole organization asks.
During the session, we tried something simple. People paired up and shared a real challenge. Instead of giving advice, their partner responded only with a question. Just one powerful question. Then they switched.
It’s mindblowing, how much thinking happens when someone creates space instead of filling it.
PS: Don't miss our freebie this week!
Did you miss our last newsletters?
Inboxes can get a little crazy, right? Just in case you missed them, here are the links to our previous newsletters:
- Newsletter #18: I’m sharing how coaching is becoming a global movement, how AI and human transformation now work hand-in-hand, and what AI still can’t hear — even at TEDx. → LINK HERE
- Newsletter #17: I'm sharing how breaking the “mirror” of agreement can shake your team, why waiting for clarity before coaching is the wrong move, and how an AI coach helped one leader finally connect the dots in his career story. → LINK HERE
- Newsletter #16: I’m introducing my AI twin coach! How AI coaching can transform those 11 PM “stuck moments” into breakthroughs, and why the real magic comes when AI and human coaching work together.→ LINK HERE
Thanks for reading. Just drop a quick reply if you have any feedback.
Wishing you a great weekend ahead.
Warm regards,
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