Time to read: 8 minutes
In this newsletter, you will find two topics:
- I Was Coached Badly
- I Already Know Your World
- Your Leadership In The AI Age
Hi {{first_name | default: 'there'}},
Last week I shared something on LinkedIn I had never said publicly before. That I had been coached badly.
The post went viral. And the responses told me something: people have been having this conversation in private for a long time.
So let me go deeper here than a LinkedIn post allows.
A few years ago I was going through something I did not want to figure out alone. The kind of thing that keeps you up at 2am. Where you replay the same thoughts and get nowhere.
So I did what I tell others to do. I asked for help. I hired a coach.
The sessions were polished. The questions sounded like they came from a textbook. "Where do you feel this in your body?" "If your challenge were a colour, what would it be?"
I tried to answer. Really tried. But nothing landed.
So I did what many high-achievers do when they feel lost in a room. I performed. I gave smart-sounding answers. I nodded at the right moments. And I left each session thinking I had failed a test nobody told me I was taking.
Underneath it all, one quiet thought: maybe I am the problem.
That is where so many people get stuck. They leave a coaching session feeling confused. They assume coaching is not for them. Too analytical. Too guarded. Not ready enough.
Many never try again.
What I know now is this. It was not me. It was a connection problem.
Good coaching does not work by technique alone. It works when two people can actually meet. When the coach gets not just your words but your world. Without that, even the best question is just noise.
I Already Know Your World
That word, connection, changed how I think about my own work.
I eventually found the right coach. The difference was not the method or the credentials. She understood the world I came from. I did not have to translate myself. I just had to show up.
That experience shapes everything I do today.
→ I work with people under pressure in high-stakes environments. People used to performing at the top who have zero patience for anything that does not meet them where they are. I get that world. The Big4 teaches you ambition, pressure, and that showing uncertainty is a risk.
→ I work with people who lost their jobs in a reorg or because of AI. I have been there. I lost my job years ago while working harder than ever. I know what it feels like to do everything right and still end up on the wrong side of a decision made without you.
→ I work with people who left corporate life and found that building something of their own is nothing like what they trained for.
When I coach someone going through any of this, I do not need the backstory explained. I already know it. That is what makes the questions land.
If you wrote coaching off after a bad experience, I understand. But ask yourself one thing. Not "is this coach qualified?" Ask: "Does this person know my world without me having to explain it?"
That is the only question that matters.
I have 2 complimentary coaching slots left for April. No pitch. No colour questions. Just a real conversation.
Your Leadership In The AI Age
The same idea applies beyond coaching. It applies to leadership.
Think about the best leader you ever worked with. Probably not the one with the shiniest CV or the sharpest strategy deck. It was the one who understood your reality. Who did not need a long briefing to get what you were dealing with.
That kind of understanding is becoming rarer and more valuable at the same time.
AI is changing how we work, how teams are built, and what leadership even means. The old playbooks are losing relevance fast.
I know, that in the next 1-3 years, the leaders who will thrive are not the ones with the best answers. They are the ones who ask the right questions, in the right context, to the right people. Sound familiar?
This is exactly what I will be exploring on April 23 in Vienna with the IMD Alumni Club. The topic: Leadership In The AI Era. If you are in the area or know someone who would benefit, I would love to see you there. Hit reply here or drop a message to hello@thechangerepublic.com so I can book a complimentary ticket for you.
Whether it is coaching, leading a team, or navigating your own career, the principle stays the same.
Connection first. Context first. The rest follows.
And I hope you have the chance to take some days off. Don't eat the bunny 🐇, just her eggs.
Hugs,
Tünde
Did you miss our last newsletters?
Inboxes can get a little crazy, right? Just in case you missed them, here are the links to our previous newsletters:
- Newsletter #29: I’m sharing how asking AI for a mirror reveals your blind spots, why thinking is becoming cheap, and how to define your value in the AI age. → LINK HERE
- Newsletter #28: I’m sharing how asking AI for a mirror reveals your blind spots, why thinking is becoming cheap, and how to define your value in the AI age. → LINK HERE
- Newsletter #27: I’m sharing why I stopped asking my teenager about jobs, why judgment beats answers in the AI age, and how to train real sense-making. → LINK HERE
Thanks for reading. Just drop a quick reply if you have any feedback.
Wishing you a great weekend ahead.
P.S. If you ever sat in a coaching session thinking "what just happened?" hit reply. I read every one, and these are the conversations I find most interesting.
Until next time,
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